Those were the days..

I miss the stability of working in the military. You know, you never had to decide what to wear, you never had to worry about where you wanted to live as they would send you to the places that best suited you and them, you never had to worry about a company car, you never had to worry about what to make for dinner when you were working.You didn't have to worry about the downturn in the economy as your job was secure, and you never had to worry about taking trips and they arranged all your travel around the world for you in far off exotic lands, and lets not forget the camping in camouflage!

I do miss those days and I do miss hanging with friends. I know I have a good life and I have enjoyed what I have done since leaving the military. I also know I am well off because off the military. The training they gave me helped make me what I am today.

I do appreciate what the people and companies I have worked for in the last 12 year's have done for me as well. I have made some good friends in the oil patch, and I have learned a lot from the best. I have had some great opportunities to succeed and I have moved up with the help of others trusting my talents. My advantage to succeeding in my current positions though started from the training and discipline the military gave me.

So this is another reason I am so torn right now. I typically like stability in my life and I like to know where I am going to be in a year from now. In this industry I had that, up until a couple years ago. Now I don't know where I will be from one month to the next. This is really hard on someone that likes to be organized and stable.

That being said, I do like challenges and changes of project work but without the worry of of employment or having to change positions. I suppose if I wasn't so driven to succeed then I could settle into a 9-5 manager position and just enjoy myself...maybe in in 10-15 years. I suppose then I will also be looking back to now and saying Those were also the good old days!

Do you ever......

Do you ever get that feeling that your not in the right place or the right time for where you are in your life? Do you ever wonder what the next month...2 months...year will bring? Do you ever get frustrated and angry at people and things, but it is really not their fault, it is just the mood your in? Do you ever want to just shut every thing down, turn off the lights and go for a 7 day walk? Do you ever want to just sell everything, pay off all your bills, and move away to a small country and live the quiet life? Ok Ok maybe not that bad but still, that's the way the last month has felt for me.

My week was one of those weeks again where I felt like I wanted to stay where I am at 1 minute, and then leave the next. My BP(blood pressure) and RHR (Resting Heart Rate)have been high the last while. In my earlier blogs you will see how happy I was to have both in the normal to excellent range. Another thing, I have not been able to loose weight(mind you i have not tried) but actually have put on a couple pounds. It has been fluctuating the last 3 weeks, up and down. I know all the factors why, being in hotel in Calgary for a few days, the drinking and eating at the 3 day golf tournament this week, the late night snacks at home here, and not sticking to recording what I am eating and tracking my calories. That all has played into it. I did have a lot of people however comment on the weight I loss this week, so It has motivated a lil more to get back on track and loose the 30+ lbs I want before December 31. Even to loose 10 lbs a month for the next 4 months would be awesome. It would put me into one-derland(in the 100's for weight) where I have not been for almost 8 years.

I also have not been doing my company finances and it is going to turn into a mess if I don't start entering all my receipts into my finance program that I paid $400 to manage my company finances. I haven't done the DVD for the reunion that I wanted to do yet. I haven't done anything around house or garage that I wanted to do. I have had no drive at all the last month and a bit.

I think it has a lot to do with my work situation and the fact that I have not allowed my self to settle in mentally. I have physically committed to a lease, and bought $5k in furniture and $2k in household goods and a $25K jeep, but I have not committed in my heart to being there long term. I think that I need to make a hard a decision in the next two weeks in regards to where I am and where I am working. I am thinking that if I do not take the position, or am not offered the position with ?????? company, I will just accept my position in Regina, hunker down and get it done. I will stay there until next year and re-evaluate what i want to do then.
If I do take a new job, that's it,same thing, I am going to stay there for a while and commit to improving both myself and my lifestyle. this jumping around sucks, and I like stability in my life.

Now back to the fun things this week, I really enjoyed the Log golf tournament. Seen a lot old friends and made a few new ones. I played 2 good days a of golf, and was very happy with my game for the most part. I think that I am getting better and i just need that consistent play, and to be able to relax more when I play. ( slow it down, concentrate, don't think).

I plan on having a get together in the near future with friends at my house, a BBQ and a game of cards. Again all hinging on whether I change jobs or not. I am looking forward to going to Ottawa and visiting with Dave and Linda for the September long weekend, and catching up on the last 12 years. that will be a nice mini vacation. October I plan on going to Mexico with them and doing some diving and relaxing again. First real away vacation in years.

Ok, that's a lot of thoughts for one blog. I hope my week goes well in Regina, and I hope that I can make some huge gains on some of my infrastructure short comings in I have in regards to the warehouse, and forklifts and jersey barriers and furniture.

I am back home on Friday again for the weekend, flights are booked, and I am already looking forward to being back here. Golf next Sunday as well wit hthe Crown and Anchor!

Until the next time.....

Too many gaps....

So it has been a while since I updated this blog, almost a week. Thats a big gap. I have not been very diligent at doing a lot of things lately. I have been off my game the last couple weeks. I have several things going on in my mind and life, the most obvious has been work. I have done a couple more interviews and have another one tomorrow(I think). I do like MOST of the people I work with now except I feel it is a failing cause. I cant get any traction with getting things done there. I can't get people hired or things in place. The people there is key positions have ZERO experience yet they try and run the the place and give people that have been doing this for a long time direction. These people actually think they have a clue too. They are oblivious to their inexperience and bad decisions. On top of that they try top bully people into doing things.

I had enough and have had a couple melt downs with one person, and I struggle to keep trying to do my job. I feel it is so childish yet if I let her bully and boss and continue to make bad decisions, then i am not doing the project any good, but I see no one else stand to these people and when I question people why, they want to avoid conflict, which equals that person thinking they are in charge and their decisions are correct. Sigh.....I again struggle to accept this as a former functional manager, I think behaviors need to e corrected and people need to know their limitations and their responsibilities.

I like my job and the type of work I do, and I thrive on a challenge to be successful, but I am not seeing success. Its like walking in a mine field, There is a slim chance I will get out alive but not likely. I suppose once I get out of August, I will know what I will be doing, and will have a path forward for what I will be doing the next year. If I am still in Regina by 15 September, then I will stay there, no more job hunting. If some one calls I will entertain offers, but I need to focus and get on with it.

Oh well, I head home again and golf Thursday and Friday, so this should be a great end to the week, plus hanging with my buddies on the weekend will help me relax a bit and maybe focus on the path forward.

Congrats to Caryn and Derek and their new Baby boy Benjoshua!!

So its another week down, and up and down....

I had a relatively OK week except for the run in with the Doreen II the sequel. I absolutely hate bullies in the workplace especially people who have no clue what they are doing, and I hate people with no experience working on 100's or million dollar projects , and running them like its a business out of the back of their barn. When you work on a project you need infrastructure and you need common sense. With out common sense the project because a very bad place to be. I have been there and I have done that and I won't go there again. So I finally had enough. I have this person who thinks they can bully you, lecture you, and is 8 pay grades below you. Ok enough venting on this, the end result is I ignore them, and I basically am doing what I do best, my job. I spoke to the boss and he agrees, and here we are the end of the week.

I head home tomorrow to Edmonton and I am looking forward to it. I have some plans and time to relax. I think it will be a lot of fun. I will be hanging out with Sean and I am sure Danni, so again we will get some movies and gaming in this weekend which is always fun! I need to deal with a couple home issues as well including a friend that wants to live at my place while I am away. After a few emails from various people and him, I should at least give an answer. But I am not happy being put in this position in the first place. I will vent more on this another time

I also have to head to Calgary for Monday , but I am not leaving until Monday morning. I am kind of disappointment with some of my old friends from Calgary, except for Rod, it's funny how people want to hang out when your not in that city, but when your actually there, they never have time OR I have to go out of my way to see them. I guess I am used to being sociable and going out of my way to host people that come and visit. I understand people have lives, but I guess if they were a friend on any level other than an "Acquaintance" I expect at least a coffee visit.

I will be back in Edmonton on the Wednesday night for the log golf tournament. Again that should be a lot of fun. I look forward to seeing my buddies again. I don't get to spend enough time hanging with my old army buddies. That's always fun and the prices are pretty amazing. I feel so connected to my army buddies even when I don't see them for months at a time, They treat you with respect and they go out of their way to see you.

Ok so this whole blog has been like the stock markets this week, up and down and down and up. I guess that's why they call it a blog, to vent and let people know..."Hey, he is a fricken nutball!" Later people.....

Whew, its heating up....found Summer!

What a beautiful week weather wise in Regina. We went golfing on Sunday and the weather was absolutely phenomenal and it has been that way all week. It has been between 25-30 degrees. It makes for a nice week at work, although i do hide out in my Air conditioned office!

Work is starting to get busier and I have more things to do now. Most though relly on others to get back to me which is always a slow process it seems. I am still trying to rent some offsite warehouse space, and get some equipment but again have been unsuccessful to date. I am waiting for a work truck and a cell phone, and on and on and on.....oh the joys of setting up a site.

I have done another interview as well, one with Epcor and although I think I did well, I don't think I will be considered for the role just because of my background and salary expectations. Sometimes I think I do that on purpose, because II don't want the job or I want to see where they will go. With the slow market place now, they have more choices, I don't think better choices, but they can get a cheaper person for the role which some companies seem to do. I often see teh same position I have applied to advertised again a month later.

I head to Edmonton this weekend and Calgary next week, so that will be a nic e break. I am golfing next Thursday in Edmonton at the Log Golf Tourni so I will enjoy that as well, two weekends in a row at home.

I strated todays blog late and I have to run to work, so I will either finish it there, or pick up again tomorrow........

WHAT?

So Friday I had my ears totally blocked , that's right I could not hear a think. Somehow I managed to, while cleaning my ears Thursday with a Qtip, push wax into the canals of the ears. The right side closed up first and then the left. I have never had a problem with my ears and excess wax before so this took me by surprise. Friday I figured I would just bring some Qtips to work and clean them all day, bad idea! All I do was totally make my ears sore AND totally block up my ears to the point where I couldn't hear anything. I went toe the walk in clinic here in Regina. I hate these things cause you get there and sit and wait for a couple hours. To my surprise, by the time I walked in the door, seen the doctor and walked out was 12 minutes. Now that is something of a record!! I would go back again to that place knowing I can get in that quick. ANYWAYS I seen the doctor, and three was nothing they could do at this point. What she suggested was put warm olive oil in my ears 3 times a day, until the wax soften and then it would fall out or I could come back in a week and they would flush my ears.....a week...nope...not gonna work for me. So I went to the pharmacy picked up some eye droppers, olive oil, and an ear flusher.

I went back to work and put olive oil in my ears every 30 minutes. When I got home that night I flushed my ears, and then again put olive oil in my ears every 20 minutes,. By 9:30pm I had flushed my ears again, and the left one came unclogged. Man was my TV loud! I am surprised the neighbors didn't complain, then again if they did I probably didnt hear them knocking at the door! By Saturday afternoon my other ear was clear. I have flushed them a couple a day and they seem fine now. So now I know the cure for waxy ears, olive oil !

Saturday I spent the day picking up the odds and sods I needed around the apartment. I was not feeling the greatest because of my ears so I was happy to get back home and have a nap. I also had to golf Sunday so I wanted to try and rest so I was feeling up to that. So I basically rested Saturday, made a roast and watched a couple movies. I was in bed by 9:30pm that night.

Sunday I was up bright and early and off to golf. It was an awesome day for golf. Hardly no wind. We started at 7:56am and it was already 21 degrees. We had no line ups, no waits and I played not half bad. I actually felt really good about my game, except for the one or melt down holes. However, I did not use one mulligan that day. I usually use 4-5 a game so I guess that's a good sign. My score was not that much less however the fact I didn't use a mulligan is a good sign I may be getting better. Oh and I did break a hundred which I have not done for a while this year. It was a par 73 course and I got 99 so not bad!

This week I should be busy at work trying to get a warehouse rented. I also have shipments coming in, and stuff to pick up. I need to try and get some things done before I leave Friday as i am working in Calgary again next week so I won`t be back here until the 21 August. I am hoping to hire a couple people in the next couple weeks to start to get things organized and set up. Things here seem to go at a very slow pace, so i have to push hard to get them done.

Well time to take on the week....enjoy the day.....

Back in the Shit!

So at work I discovered mouse poop on my desk, so I guess I truly am back in the field and I love it! We will hunt these critters down and terminate them with no prejudice! I found it hard to get motivated at work this week. I have accomplished a few things, but not as many as I would like. I also am finding it hard to concentrate on future issues as I still don't see myself being here that long. I feel like a plane circling the airport waiting for my turn to land, or waiting for a message that I need to divert to a new airport.

I received a couple more phone calls on new opportunities, and I like both of them. The other thing I am struggling with is the longer I am here, the more I am getting into the project. I have bought a vehicle, bought all my furniture and have made several commitments(lease ect) so the longer I don't change jobs the more likely I won't. I still am not happy with the current compensation package, and I think that is what is driving me crazy and driving me to want to change. I have always been a hard worker and done a good job I believe, and been rewarded for them efforts in my previous roles. Here it seems they want to low ball you and give you as little as possible.

Ok I am done venting about work for this week, so on a positive note, I have lost the weight I put on while on holidays and while in Calgary. I mean it wasn't a lot of weight, but I feel comfortable knowing now that I can loose weight through just eating normally, and not dieting. That being said, I do want to loose 10 lbs this month, so I need to start working on that. My goal the next 4 months is to loose 30 lbs. That would put me on target for my overall goal. December will be a month off, and then my next goal is to loose 20 lbs by June. So the goals are realistic and achievable, and I have enough time and room to work it should I plateau or have a bad week.

My weed problem has been eradicated. It cost me $650 and 55 garbage bags of foliage! That's right 55! The gentlemen that did it will come back two more times to make sure they are gone for good. I need to put a budget in place to put a lawn down by next year. I was hoping to at least get my cement pad in the back. I guess that I something I will look at later this year. I should pay down some of my debt first that I accumulated while not working and coming here. Then concentrate on the back yard next year. Bah! Too much thinking. Its the weekend! Enjoy....blog ya later!

Mid week meltdown....

Well day one down after the long weekend and it was pretty uneventful. I really didn’t get a lot done other than my expenses and a few phone calls on my cell phone since I still don’t have a phone at my desk. This is, in my opinion, one of the most poorly run projects I have ever been associated with and the frustration level is pretty high with most of the staff on the project. I think in the next couple months we will see several people leaving the project and company for better and greener pastures.
I myself have not stopped looking for any opportunities that may arise as although I DO NOT like the company I am working for and the people I work with, I do like the Project, client or Toronto office that I am attached to. In typical Marty fashion I will stick it out for a while and get things set up and running, and going in the right direction. My task this week is to find a place where I can rent some indoor space to put materials until I have a warehouse built which won’t be until at least January if I am lucky.
Anyways, enough venting about work today. I do not want to get my BP up so early. Speaking of which, it seems to have been on the rise the last couple weeks. I need to relax and get that back in check. I was doing so well the longest time, and for some reason I have let things get to me the past while. The small stuff that should not matter piss me off lately, to the point where i work myself up into a bad mood.
I think it has to do with the shitty work environment, and the fact that I don’t feel like I am in the right place yet, that I am still circling looking for a place to land and relax and work. I suppose once this week goes by, and I don’t hear from the two jobs that I just interviewed form, then it will be a done deal and I can concentrate a little bit more on this place. I am also signing up to the gym this Saturday and going to try and get out golfing for the day Sunday. That will give me a sense of belonging here I guess.
I am already looking forward to my next trip home on 19 August for the Logistic Golf Tournament. It should be fun to see some of the old guys again. Also it will be 5 days home for a rest. The next trip is the September long weekend, where I am heading to Ottawa to hang with some old friends of mine I haven’t seen in 14 years(until the reunion) This way we have the weekend to catch up on a lot of things from the past decade. We were such great friends back then, and it was a shame that we parted for so long. This should be good to reunite and get together a couple times a year to hang out.
Work time, catch y’all later!

I'm the guy the weed........,,problem

What a great long weekend I just had at home in Edmonton. I was able to get out golfing a couple times and was able to spend time with some friends at a BBQ and even had time to get out to a movie, not to mention the 15 hours spent playing Xbox Rainbow 6. On top of that the weather was absolutely phenomenal! I was able to finish up in Calgary by 10:30 and head to Red Deer for a meeting there to look at some equipment. I was home in my house by 5pm Thursday night so my long weekend started right on time.
I had a little surprise waiting for me when I got home a register letter from the city because my lawn had too many weeds. Well I fooled them, I had no lawn, and my lawn was ALL weeds, none the less they had no sense of humour. I even called the city and said “I am the guy with the weed”. So I need to get someone over to cut and spray all the weeds so I don’t infect the world! Of course being away i received the notice on the 31 July written on the 24 July and they want it fixed by 3 August. I was able to get a week extension so hopefully I can call my dealer....er ...my lawn care expert over to cut and bag my weed and spray the land.
As I stated i was also able to have people over for a BBQ and I had a wonderful choice of food, like 6 choices...no not because I am a great host that allows people to eat what ever they want, it was because I left the freezer door open on the fridge, and everything defrosted around the outside edge of the freezer. See my fridge has an annoying alarm when you leave the door open, so annoying I turned off a while ago. Now I understand the annoying alarms purpose. The Frigidaire Gods have taught me a valuable lesson in meat management. Good thing it was just the fridge freezer and not my stand up one or we would have been eating buffalo for weeks!
I have let myself go again the last 10 days with staying in a hotel in Calgary, and the long weekend home, I did not eat right or controlled all week. I even drank twice. So I need to get back on track with the weight loss. I was fortunate that the damage was only minimal, I think I am .5 lb heavier this morning than I was the Saturday I left to come home, tight on the 240.2 mark. I feel good about one thing though , and that is that I can eat normally, and even splurge a bit now and it does not turn into instant weight gain. I hope once I shed a few more lbs that my weight maintenance program will be fairly easy if that is the case. I think I eat fairly decent and not overly indulge, and with me working and golfing, I am active enough to burn a lot of calories during the day as well. My new short term goal is to be down to 234 by the log golf tournament on 19 August. That gives me two weeks to lose 6 lbs which is very achievable.
One thing though I have found I have been a little stressed out lately with the job interviews and the travel etc and my blood pressure has been slowly climbing back up. My resting heart rate has been average to good. I think once I sign up to the YMCA this weekend and start going 2-3 times a week that will help with that.
Well time to get ready for work, I will try and update this more often again. Have a great short week!