Do you ever get that feeling that your not in the right place or the right time for where you are in your life? Do you ever wonder what the next month...2 months...year will bring? Do you ever get frustrated and angry at people and things, but it is really not their fault, it is just the mood your in? Do you ever want to just shut every thing down, turn off the lights and go for a 7 day walk? Do you ever want to just sell everything, pay off all your bills, and move away to a small country and live the quiet life? Ok Ok maybe not that bad but still, that's the way the last month has felt for me.
My week was one of those weeks again where I felt like I wanted to stay where I am at 1 minute, and then leave the next. My BP(blood pressure) and RHR (Resting Heart Rate)have been high the last while. In my earlier blogs you will see how happy I was to have both in the normal to excellent range. Another thing, I have not been able to loose weight(mind you i have not tried) but actually have put on a couple pounds. It has been fluctuating the last 3 weeks, up and down. I know all the factors why, being in hotel in Calgary for a few days, the drinking and eating at the 3 day golf tournament this week, the late night snacks at home here, and not sticking to recording what I am eating and tracking my calories. That all has played into it. I did have a lot of people however comment on the weight I loss this week, so It has motivated a lil more to get back on track and loose the 30+ lbs I want before December 31. Even to loose 10 lbs a month for the next 4 months would be awesome. It would put me into one-derland(in the 100's for weight) where I have not been for almost 8 years.
I also have not been doing my company finances and it is going to turn into a mess if I don't start entering all my receipts into my finance program that I paid $400 to manage my company finances. I haven't done the DVD for the reunion that I wanted to do yet. I haven't done anything around house or garage that I wanted to do. I have had no drive at all the last month and a bit.
I think it has a lot to do with my work situation and the fact that I have not allowed my self to settle in mentally. I have physically committed to a lease, and bought $5k in furniture and $2k in household goods and a $25K jeep, but I have not committed in my heart to being there long term. I think that I need to make a hard a decision in the next two weeks in regards to where I am and where I am working. I am thinking that if I do not take the position, or am not offered the position with ?????? company, I will just accept my position in Regina, hunker down and get it done. I will stay there until next year and re-evaluate what i want to do then.
If I do take a new job, that's it,same thing, I am going to stay there for a while and commit to improving both myself and my lifestyle. this jumping around sucks, and I like stability in my life.
Now back to the fun things this week, I really enjoyed the Log golf tournament. Seen a lot old friends and made a few new ones. I played 2 good days a of golf, and was very happy with my game for the most part. I think that I am getting better and i just need that consistent play, and to be able to relax more when I play. ( slow it down, concentrate, don't think).
I plan on having a get together in the near future with friends at my house, a BBQ and a game of cards. Again all hinging on whether I change jobs or not. I am looking forward to going to Ottawa and visiting with Dave and Linda for the September long weekend, and catching up on the last 12 years. that will be a nice mini vacation. October I plan on going to Mexico with them and doing some diving and relaxing again. First real away vacation in years.
Ok, that's a lot of thoughts for one blog. I hope my week goes well in Regina, and I hope that I can make some huge gains on some of my infrastructure short comings in I have in regards to the warehouse, and forklifts and jersey barriers and furniture.
I am back home on Friday again for the weekend, flights are booked, and I am already looking forward to being back here. Golf next Sunday as well wit hthe Crown and Anchor!
Until the next time.....
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